🔗 Share this article Late-Night Personalities Take Aim At Trump's Latest 'Gold Card' Visa Scheme Television's top hosts used the airtime mocking ex-President Donald Trump's newly launched visa program, dubbed the "gold card," characterizing it as a obvious pay-to-play scheme for the affluent. Colbert's Pointed Take Opening his show, Stephen Colbert delivered a satirical Christmas tune directed at the commander-in-chief. "He's making a list, reviewing it twice, and then handing that list to the people at ICE," he intoned. "The President ... spoils all he touches." The focus was the controversial plan that allows overseas citizens to acquire U.S. residency for an investment of one million dollars, with a "top-tier" version for five million. The program's portal promises approval "in record time." "A quick note here to affluent applicants: before you pony up, have you considered Canada?" Colbert remarked. He explained that the card is also designed to "extract cash" from companies wishing to hire skilled workers, with significant payments. "That's a lot of fees, but if you sign up, you additionally get a complimentary stay at a property of your choosing – if it's the Tampa Marriott Bonvoy," he added. "The best vetting the U.S. government has ever done," said Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to ensure these individuals truly are eligible to be in America." "That's important, you gotta prove you're suitable to be an American," Colbert said dryly. "First question: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?" Jimmy Kimmel's Humorous Roast On his late-night show, Jimmy Kimmel labeled the visa program the "U.S. Access Express Card." "Here's a card that will permit wealthy overseas citizens to live here," he stated. "In exchange for a million dollars, you get official resident status, you get a route to citizenship, and a presidential pardon for one serious crime of your choice." "Perhaps it's time to revise that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – forget about your huddled masses. Give us a million bucks, you're in!" he added. Kimmel teased the brevity of the form, noting it is "more difficult to start a Wordle account." He said that Trump "thinks citizenship is something you can sell, like a steak." "Indeed, the top people are the rich people," Kimmel quipped. "That's what Jesus always said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's simpler for a camel to go through the eye of a needle if you pay the needle a million dollars." Seth Meyers discussing Economic Concerns Meanwhile, Seth Meyers addressed Trump's declining approval numbers amid economic concerns. "People gave Donald Trump a second term because they were upset about the economy," he noted. This week, in a attempt to discuss prices, Trump conducted a briefing in front of a selection of grocery items, and behaved peculiarly to some cereal. "These look great, I think I'm going to take some of them with me to my place and have a lot of fun," Trump stated. "Such as the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a while." "Trump is so incredibly weird," Meyers said. "Like, you're going to take them back to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What are you gonna do with those Cheerios?" Meyers finished by mocking right-leaning news defenses of Trump's financial performance. "Maybe instead of complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy like what FIFA did," he joked.
Television's top hosts used the airtime mocking ex-President Donald Trump's newly launched visa program, dubbed the "gold card," characterizing it as a obvious pay-to-play scheme for the affluent. Colbert's Pointed Take Opening his show, Stephen Colbert delivered a satirical Christmas tune directed at the commander-in-chief. "He's making a list, reviewing it twice, and then handing that list to the people at ICE," he intoned. "The President ... spoils all he touches." The focus was the controversial plan that allows overseas citizens to acquire U.S. residency for an investment of one million dollars, with a "top-tier" version for five million. The program's portal promises approval "in record time." "A quick note here to affluent applicants: before you pony up, have you considered Canada?" Colbert remarked. He explained that the card is also designed to "extract cash" from companies wishing to hire skilled workers, with significant payments. "That's a lot of fees, but if you sign up, you additionally get a complimentary stay at a property of your choosing – if it's the Tampa Marriott Bonvoy," he added. "The best vetting the U.S. government has ever done," said Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to ensure these individuals truly are eligible to be in America." "That's important, you gotta prove you're suitable to be an American," Colbert said dryly. "First question: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?" Jimmy Kimmel's Humorous Roast On his late-night show, Jimmy Kimmel labeled the visa program the "U.S. Access Express Card." "Here's a card that will permit wealthy overseas citizens to live here," he stated. "In exchange for a million dollars, you get official resident status, you get a route to citizenship, and a presidential pardon for one serious crime of your choice." "Perhaps it's time to revise that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – forget about your huddled masses. Give us a million bucks, you're in!" he added. Kimmel teased the brevity of the form, noting it is "more difficult to start a Wordle account." He said that Trump "thinks citizenship is something you can sell, like a steak." "Indeed, the top people are the rich people," Kimmel quipped. "That's what Jesus always said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's simpler for a camel to go through the eye of a needle if you pay the needle a million dollars." Seth Meyers discussing Economic Concerns Meanwhile, Seth Meyers addressed Trump's declining approval numbers amid economic concerns. "People gave Donald Trump a second term because they were upset about the economy," he noted. This week, in a attempt to discuss prices, Trump conducted a briefing in front of a selection of grocery items, and behaved peculiarly to some cereal. "These look great, I think I'm going to take some of them with me to my place and have a lot of fun," Trump stated. "Such as the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a while." "Trump is so incredibly weird," Meyers said. "Like, you're going to take them back to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What are you gonna do with those Cheerios?" Meyers finished by mocking right-leaning news defenses of Trump's financial performance. "Maybe instead of complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy like what FIFA did," he joked.